Biggest Obstacle for 40-something Beginner Guitarists

When you are a kid, your job is to learn. You do very few things as well as the grown-ups around you. By the time you are a mature member of society, one measures oneself by what you can do, and what you have accomplished.

Learning a new skill as an adult can be very frustrating because suddenly you are a beginner again, and the beginner mind is a foreign place. Yet, as mature adults, this (the beginner mind) is an essential mindset to be comfortable with. Because when you stop learning, you start dying. Studies have shown that the more active one’s brain, i.e., learning new things, the better it holds up over time. And the more interesting you are to talk to.

You have to get over not feeling good about yourself because you aren’t good at something you are just started learning. Accept the newness of it, and keep reminding your self that anything worth doing takes time to master and all masters start as beginners.

Comments

Frank Gironda says:

February 19, 2012 at 4:50 pm

How true Ben, I started guitar when I was 60. Been wanting to do it since I was a Kid. People nowadays have so many more resources, It’s great.

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Ann says:

April 3, 2012 at 6:17 am

I’m absolutely 40-and-then-something, and to me it was incredibly liberating to pick up my guitarplaying again when the kids went to college this fall. I actually learn much faster now because my job in the wonderful world of IT has taught me to identify and deal with challenges immediately. I also know that anything can be solved through hard, systematic work.
Women (amateur) guitarists are generally looked down on where I live, and getting help in music stores is close to impossible. I’m joining a women’s Rock community to see if that can boost my self confidence.

I really love your website!

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- Ben Brown says:
  
  April 3, 2012 at 8:31 am
  
  Thanks! I love your attitude! Can you tell me more about the women’s Rock community?
  
  Reply
  - Ann says:
    
    April 4, 2012 at 6:12 am
    
    I don’t know very much yet, as I’ve joined really recently
    
    This is an excerpt from their website that I’ve translated and edited:
    “… non-profit music organization that works to recruit, motivate and promote women in all aspects of the music industry. Music education is our core activity. We offer instrument classes, interaction classes and courses in audio and lighting technology, Cubase, DJ, jazz and songwriting. Anyone over 14 can attend our courses.
    We also hire out rehearsal rooms.”
    
    It is probably a political feminist initiativ from the early ninties, believe it receives some governmental support.
    
    I’d be more than happy to report on my adventure
    
    Reply
    - Ben Brown says:
      
      April 4, 2012 at 7:10 am
      
      I love to hear stories about musical adventures!You mentioned that you translated the website. Where is it’s base? I’m just a po’ country boy from Kentucky and still find this whole World Wide Web thing fascinating!
      
      Reply
Rick says:

December 12, 2012 at 8:44 am

I’ve taken lessons on and off since I was a kid, I’m not the best student and something always comes up that makes me have to discontinue and once I’m left to my own devices things all fall by the wayside. Things being as they are, I always feel like I’m starting over because, well, I am. I keep waiting for playing to become less laborious and more instinctive and that never really happens because I’m always at a point where you have to grind through things to build a foundation – learning chords, scales, reading exercises, etc. and that’s always more work and less fun to me.

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- Ben Brown says:
  
  December 12, 2012 at 9:48 am
  
  Sounds like you’re pushing too hard, either trying to progress too fast or start with material that’s too advanced. So quit grinding and learn a song. Try Horse With No Name for some instant success then one of the tunes suggested below for a next step.
  
  Reply
  - Rick says:
    
    December 14, 2012 at 12:57 pm
    
    Hey Ben,
    I’ve never thought of myself and pushing too hard. Usually the opposite. I haven’ t been a very good student in terms of practicing consistently and I’ve and to stop and start lessons too often.
    
    Reply
    - Rick says:
      
      December 17, 2012 at 7:03 pm
      
      I’ve been trying to start off easy and just try to get the wheels turning again mentally. When I continually flub the same basic chord changes, I want to scream.
      
      Reply
      - Rick says:
        
        December 18, 2012 at 10:54 am
        
        I’ve been at it about a month now and I feel like I should be smoothing out the total newb stuff and I don’t really feel as though I am.
Rick says:

January 31, 2013 at 6:11 pm

Wheel in a ditch and a wheel on the track

I have no focus, no drive and no momentum or motivation right now. This is maddening really. I have such diligence in certain areas, and so little to do something that I always say I want to do, and have been trying to make progress in for MANY years. Doesn’t make any sense.

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Mary Z Cox says:

March 10, 2013 at 5:03 pm

LOL Love your site–looks so fun ! Bought a guitar about 2 years ago even though I’m not a guitarist –its really fun ! Have been approaching it like Zen guitar and only learn tunes that I really like, and just play them when I feel like it. It does take awhile to play a tune–but when it gels, it sounds very nice.
Tell the older players to be patient–that motor muscle memory has to kick in before you begin to feel comfy with a tune.

This year, I’ve begun formal lessons with a real guitarist and I have to say that it really saves me a lot of time and grief to have this young man work out arrangements for me to use as a starting point on a new tune.

At first, I think he was a little put off when I said I only wanted to work on this one tune for several months, but after he saw what I wanted–he really perked up and seems to enjoy the lessons as much as I do.
We began with a simple lead in first position, then a simple harmony in first position. Now we are playing an alternate lead in the third position.
And I have a little surprise–I even worked out an additional version by ear in first position that is slinkier than the lesson version . His versions are very nice, but my version sounds more like me And I’ve worked out a couple different ways to play back up chords to it too.
But, since I don’t have a deadline–it leaves me free to explore tunes and have them sound good.

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